Torstaina sain päätös maahanmuuttovirastolta että saan suomalainen kansalaisuus.
Haista vittu, persut. Torilla (ja äänestyskopissa) tavataan.
(switching to English in the comments, but it’s okay, you can Google it)
I’m not often driven to introspection or reflection, but the question does come up sometimes. The big question. So big, there’s just no containing it within the puny boundaries of a single set of punctuationary bookends.
Who are these mysterious and unsung heroes of obscurity and shadow? What is their origin story? Do they have a prequel trilogy? What are their secret identities? What are their public identities, for that matter? What are their powers? Their abilities? Their haunted pasts and troubled futures? Their modus operandi? Where do they live anyway, and when? What do they do for a living? Do they really have these fantastical adventures, or is it a dazzlingly intellectual and overwrought metaphor? Or is it perhaps a smug and post-modern sort of metaphor? Is it a plain stupid metaphor, hedged around with thick wads of plausible deniability, a soap bubble of illusory plot dependent upon readers who don’t dare question it for fear of looking foolish? A flight of fancy, having dozed off in front of the television during an episode of something suitably spaceship-oriented? Do they have a quest, a handler, a mission statement, a department-level development objective in five stages?
I am Hatboy.
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Weirdly, this frustratingly slow yet chaotic process ended very abruptly, with a message on Thursday morning that my paperwork was being processed. A few hours later, I got an SMS saying a decision had been reached, and so I logged into the system website and saw that it had been approved.
Now I just need to get a passport – but either way it doesn’t interfere with my Australia citizenship so the trip in July isn’t going to be messed up.
It’s been a long road to get here, and I’m not sure how much I want to babble on about it. Certainly right now I don’t have time to babble on anyway. But long story short, for the first ten years of my time in Finland I felt that I didn’t deserve citizenship – I wasn’t Finnish enough. For the second ten years, quite frankly, I felt I was a better Finn than an awful lot of Finns (particularly of the Perus variety), and that therefore Finland didn’t deserve to have me as a citizen.
When I reached 44 years of age and realised I’d been half my life in either hemisphere, I figured it was time to get it done. And it took just under a year, all told. Which … is actually pretty fast, and I can thank my white maleness for that.
I didn’t think I’d feel any different as a citizen, but I do. I feel safer, more content, and as if a small but noticeable weight has lifted from my back where it has always been sitting. That weight that said I was an outsider, that I didn’t belong, that I had been sent away once and I could be sent away again the second they decided my papers weren’t right. It wasn’t anything the Finnish people did – not the ones who are my friends, certainly – but it was a very real feeling that I mostly didn’t notice until, last night, I realised it was gone.
I’m a Finn now.
I’d like to also take a quiet moment to appreciate how Google Translate deals with the PerusSuomalaiset nickname of choice, “persut”.
And your Finnish meme powers are impressive.
I could have put a bit more effort into the Photoshop but I was pressed for time. And a little hungover (an unrelated bender).
In addition to that invisible weight lifting from you back, I imagine you also immediately found yourself just loving mämmi, salmiakki, karjalanpiirakka, lanttulaatikko and lihapiirakka?
Congrats! Tai siis: Onneksi olkoon!
Jätkä on jo vittu vienyt meidän naiset ja duunit, joten jää nyt sitten perkele! ❤
Hyvin sanottu! Ja kiitos. Koko prosessi kesti vähän alle 1v. – voinut olla pahempaa. Ei muuta kun bileet syksyllä!
Don’t know any Finnish words except Sima – I know what THAT is thanks to your expert technical instructions … so apart from a big congrats, the additional most important part of these comments I needed to read and understand were the words “so the trip in July isn’t going to be messed up”.
Truly excellent news.
Exactly! If I get my Finnish passport in good time I will be able to James Bond my way through the EU lines so my family doesn’t need to wait around for me as we leave Europe. Both passports are valid though.
I am a citizen of two hemispheres – one step closer to the Doctor: “a citizen of the universe, and a gentleman to boot!”