WordPress just teamed up with Anchor to create a “change your blog into a podcast” service. I have no idea how it works and aside from Welcome to Night Vale I have no real idea what a podcast even is.
So, to celebrate the 2,427th post on the Hatstand, I’m going to make this post into a podcast and see what happens. Let’s keep it simple for now and then maybe some longer rants, or maybe even short stories, can achieve audio form even though Amazon and Audible is still messing us around.
This is a test of the Hatstand podcasting system. Please stand by.
I’m not often driven to introspection or reflection, but the question does come up sometimes. The big question. So big, there’s just no containing it within the puny boundaries of a single set of punctuationary bookends.
Who are these mysterious and unsung heroes of obscurity and shadow? What is their origin story? Do they have a prequel trilogy? What are their secret identities? What are their public identities, for that matter? What are their powers? Their abilities? Their haunted pasts and troubled futures? Their modus operandi? Where do they live anyway, and when? What do they do for a living? Do they really have these fantastical adventures, or is it a dazzlingly intellectual and overwrought metaphor? Or is it perhaps a smug and post-modern sort of metaphor? Is it a plain stupid metaphor, hedged around with thick wads of plausible deniability, a soap bubble of illusory plot dependent upon readers who don’t dare question it for fear of looking foolish? A flight of fancy, having dozed off in front of the television during an episode of something suitably spaceship-oriented? Do they have a quest, a handler, a mission statement, a department-level development objective in five stages?
I am Hatboy.
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Anchor doesn’t like apostrophes (or “& # 8217 ;s”, as Anchor calls them) in its titles. So I had to re-release this test post. Stand by.
I went with Cassidy’s voice, although Remy’s voice is arguably more attractive. I may alternate between the two. But this is fucking eerie.
And that’s it, it should be done. Podboy’s Podstand is up and running.
It’s on Spotify and Anchor. I’m not sure if it’s working properly yet but let’s see.
“We got your distribution request! Upon approval, our team will submit your show, Podboy’s Podstand, to additional listening platforms.
“It generally takes a few business days for other platforms to review and approve new shows, so hang tight. We’ll email you as soon as it becomes available.”
Right, so that’s it. Stand by for auditory wisdom.
Is that why it just shows up as “something went wrong” on Spotify? We all know I’m a fuck knuckle when it comes to these things…. I assumed it was just me…
Yeah, Spotify will apparently take 1-3 days to approve and distribute it, Apple and Google maybe a week. I’m wondering why it won’t even play on the podcast homepage itself but that may take 24 hours to show up itself.
To be continued!
You were meant to say “of course you’re not a fuck knuckle Toonster”.
But you said we all know it. Why would I disagree with the common wisdom of ohhh I get it of course you’re not a fuck knuckle, Toonster.
Nah yeah but seriously, in this case I think it’s safe to say I am equally a fuck knuckle and have no clue what I am doing. So, learning curve for all of us!
Thankyou. I’m very fragile you know.
Now it should be up, if not at the link above, then at this new one they sent me (https://open.spotify.com/show/3Q7z5IVpTJPM4AK2rQYghJ), as well as on “pocket podcasts” (https://pca.st/ei38dk97).
I can hear!!
Yay! The robot voice is kind of weird but way better than I was expecting. I might get a microphone and actually do some proper reading though, since Anchor did not apparently make all 2,427 posts available for conversion and the selection it did offer is not exactly appropriate.
Currently torn between making a podcast of some Creepy & Hatboy stories, or some general rantings, or something else entirely. Ideas welcome!