Rogue One

Well, that sure as shit didn’t take long.

I just found out about this movie yesterday (well, I had known to some extent that the movie was coming and that Disney had plans to make spin-off Star Wars movies, but this did sort of come out of nowhere for me), and already … okay, well first, the trailer just in case you’ve been living under a rock:

Oh, the Britishness of it all. Is she going to break into the Death Star and find Lieutenant Sebastian and his superior officer arranging matches? IS SHE?

aaaand we have a brewing bullshitstorm about gender in movies. Including, but not limited to, MRA neckbeard fucksnorts complaining about women stealing Star Wars.

Now, actually there doesn’t seem to be much backlash about this at all[1]. All the response I’ve seen so far seems to be positive. My only complaint is that there seems to be a Samurai in it, but whatever. I’ll wait and see where they’re heading with that. All we have so far is this pre-emptive backlash against the noisy minority who will commence to yelling and crying pretty soon. Maybe unfair, but I think we all know the true festival of dummy-spits is coming.

[1] Here’s the original story that the Mary Sue is mocking, and while it does call the main character a Mary Sue, it also seems to be basically a joke – “I’m curious to see how many people think this is serious“, it says. Yes, the overall “article” (if you can call it an article, at a staggering one paragraph in length) was a bit snarky, but hardly explosive.

Oh well, I called it for Ghostbusters and I see no reason to change my tune now.

Fuck off, you insecure, woman-hating, knuckle-breathing, mouth-dragging, oxygen-hog cavemen. This shit looks like great fun.

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21 Responses to Rogue One

  1. stchucky says:

    I think, if I had an objection to the original article that the Mary Sue is making fun of, it would be that it is sort-of-sexistly diluting the concept of the Mary Sue trope. If you call every female action / sci-fi / fantasy hero a Mary Sue just because she can do things that a male action / sci-fi / fantasy hero can do, that’s sort of shitty.

    A Mary Sue is dramatically, ridiculously over-powered, and an expert in everything, and wins effortlessly. I don’t think that’s what we’re seeing here.

    We tend to see that more regularly in male heroes, but I think that’s just because there’s so many more of them.

  2. dreameling says:

    I think I’m just going to ignore the backlash shit this time and enjoy the wait, because…

    This. Looked. Awesome.


    Because it’s Star Wars.

    For optimal viewing experience, unless you’re on mobile, I recommend the Apple encodes, easily available from Dave’s Trailer Page:

    You can, of course, go directly to the iTunes Movies Trailers page, but there you’re limited to Apple’s web viewer.

    This has been a Star Wars Experience PSA.

  3. dreameling says:

    My only complaint is that there seems to be a Samurai in it, but whatever.

    That bugged me a bit, too, yeah. Felt a little too Earth-y for my taste in a Star Wars context. (Like the Nazis in SW:TFA.) But I’ll happily give it a pass, especially since this is just a teaser. Plus the Jedi are already basically samurai types, except with cooler swords.

    The “samurai” is played by Donnie Yen, one of China’s most famous actors and on-screen martial artists. If Disney wants Star Wars to do better and be bigger in China, and something tells me they want that market, Yen is the perfect draw for that.

    • stchucky says:

      Excellent point, and smart move on their part.

      And, to be honest, as little as I care about ninjas and samurai, it will be fun to see a swordslinger in a Star Wars who doesn’t have a lightsaber. This might be (finally!) the beginning of the acknowledgement that there is way more going on in the ol’ galaxy far, far away than Skywalkers, Solos and Jedi.

      • dreameling says:

        Swordslinger. I just learned a cool new word. And you just made that character seem 10x more awesome.

        Now, while I’m completely on board with non-core Star Wars, I have to admit that Jedis have always been my (and, sure, pretty much everyone else’s) favorite part of the mythology. If I were to play a Star Wars RPG, I’d always go for a Jedi. But, you know what, I’d be a rogue swordslinger Jedi [1]!

        [1] Still with a lightsaber, though.

      • stchucky says:

        Credit to Lucas Thorn for the term, in reference to his Nysta character.

        I kind of like the idea that there might be Force-sensitive characters who just didn’t have access to lightsaber technology. Especially in the post-takeover Empire. Of course it makes sense that there wouldn’t be Jedi. They were all gone, they’re meant to be a semi-mythological thing that “returns” in Episode IV so … yeah, that all fits.

      • dreameling says:

        Duly credited.

        I haven’t started watching the Star Wars Rebels animated series yet, but it does seem like there were more Jedi than just Kenobi and Yoda living in hiding after Episode III, and maybe passing on some of their knowledge. Which makes sense.

        But yeah, they were definitely mythical by the time we get to Episode IV, and you’d still have Force-sensitives popping up all over the galaxy.

  4. brknwntr says:

    Can we get a group that hates this movie strictly for the insanely stupid amount of hype this movie will get simply because someone decided to put Star Wars in its title. A franchise title that, and let’s face reality here, has been tired and sick since the 80’s, and really just need put down. A hack of a director had an arguably shitty movie, but it was made with new special effects and filmography styles, so everyone watching it high as a kite, got blown away. And like the heroin they were probably on, no high ever since is ever quite as good as that first high. This is a film and franchise that deserves to be sent straight to VHS as that’s the video media it’s target audience still comprehends.

    • stchucky says:

      There are many such groups, going by many names. Trolls, hipsters, the pathologically mainstream-phobic … it’s hard to say what group you, as someone who hadn’t seen a Star Wars movie until quite recently and still doesn’t really care about them one way or another, really belongs. I’m going to put you in with the shit-stirrers until a better option comes along. I’m not expecting it to.

    • dreameling says:

      … insanely stupid … tired and sick … an arguably shitty movie … straight to VHS …



    • aaronthepatriot says:

      I knew I liked you, brkn, even if you smear my reputation by preemptively taking the blame for editorial snafus for all of us without first consulting me. I agree with all this shit you wrote right here, poo in your cereal notwithstanding!

      As for this trailer, I totally saw some dudes in it. And some of those dudes seemed to be in positions of authority over the female, as is proper. So this isn’t Ghostbusters. I’m totally cool with the gender roles here XD

      However, I’m wondering if the black man is a bad guy…I couldn’t quite tell but it sounded like he might be. That, as we all know, would be racist! So I trust that’s not what’s going on here!

  5. Laurence says:

    Male, female, who cares? I’m offended that she doesn’t look a thing like a Bothan!

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