I was amused, and then outraged, this morning by a link sent to me by a friend. We sometimes share these fun eye-rolling moments, and this one was a hum-dinger.
In this “trending” story, apparently fans are raging about George RR Martin not finishing the damn books.
Okay, so for a start I think this completely misses the definition of “news”, since this is not “news” in any sense whatsoever. This has never been news. Fans have been bitching about this forever. They started doing it the moment Martin published a book that was part of a series instead of a stand-alone. And even then, it was just transferred rage from a previous author who had started a series and not finished it yet. Going back to before the inception of the written word.
“Yeah, and then what happened? THEN WHAT? DON’T FUCKING GO OFF AND DO ANOTHER FUCKING SILHOUETTE OF YOUR FUCKING HAND YOU CUNT, YOU OWE ME CLOSURE ON THAT FUCKING GAZELLE THING.”
Let’s start at the start.
No, no, no.
First of all, Martin isn’t author of a series called Game of Thrones. That’s just the title of the first book and it’s what they called the TV series because they knew it would confuse idiots, and therefore lose them viewers, if they gave series 2 a different name. I’m not entirely sure why they didn’t call the TV series A Song of Ice and Fire, but I’m okay with it because this means the show is its own thing. Anyone who bitches about them not copying the books exactly is also an idiot, because this isn’t a TV adaptation of A Song of Ice and Fire, it’s a show called Game of Thrones which is just coincidentally similar. A lot of what he said here about his characters and the scenes in the TV series bears this out.
So whatever. But don’t be saying he wrote a series called Game of Thrones.
Secondly, there’s a snippet in there about a new/old chapter release, which includes an obvious direwolf warg-dream, probably about Nymeria. I won’t go into full-on nerdrage about the “excerpt also showed hints that this could not just be a plain nightmare and could be something else” idiocy. I’m all burned out. I’ll just say this: if you don’t know who Nymeria is, fuck you. Just fuck you.
Thirdly, “However, because there have been no official dates announced for the release of the 1,500-word novel, his fans have grown impatient with the wait.”
Fifteen-hundred-word novel? Would you please proof-read your fucking text, arseclown?
Fourthly, “The rage of his fans can be traced back to 2009, according to Vocativ.”
I don’t know who or what Vocativ is and I don’t care. 2009? That’s when anger started? No, like I said, the anger started millennia ago. But specifically as relates to Martin? No. Speaking purely for myself, by 2009 I’d already been on Facebook for two years, which means I’d been off Usenet for two years, and I’d stopped being angry about the wait between books before that.
And I came late to the books! When I started reading them, we were in the long, dark waiting period before A Feast for Crows, which was published in 2005. I joined the newsgroup alt.fan.grrm (“GRRuMblers” my arse) in the early 2000s when it branched off from alt.fan.robert-jordan. Not having read the books yet at that point, I joined the group due to a promise that I would keep it alive with stupid jokes and argumentative comments if it looked like dying. After about three days, I realised the group was going to do fine without my ignorant-arse babbling, so I read the books and joined in the actual discussion.
And yes, a lot of it even back then was about how lazy Martin was, and how he owed his readers a story due to the unwritten contract of beginning a series and then not ending it. And there’s a lot to be said about that debate, but news? News it ain’t.
Lastly, “Some of the commenters said, “I don’t think he feels any stress or shame for being a lazy f**ker. If that were the case I think he would be at home trying to fix the mess he made and barely showing his face in public unless he had to, instead he is traveling and enjoying life and not writing anything.””
I sincerely hope this was said in jest. All the TV show work he’s doing, the travelling and living, it all goes into his writing and if he’s not enjoying life then how can he be expected to produce anything? Me, I like his side-projects and the books are just gravy. I think it was back in 2008 or so when he came to Finland for Finncon and I got him to sign my Game of Thrones: The Board Game board, as a sign of solidarity and approval of his other projects. Seriously, enough with the over-entitled fanboy bullplop.
Go for it, George.
But yeah. Good article. Sheesh.
I think I need a song to cheer me up.